Writers Parasite [Contains Adult Language & Situations]

[Lipinski]

Death is an interesting thing...
it seems so real.

I lost Radar today. Good ol Radar. A rescue dog from Anchorage Alaska. He did thousands of dollars worth of damage to property to include, excavator seat, F150 interior, A4 Audi interior... and yet, he was Radar.

Friends are few and far between, and for good reason...However, it is true, a dog is a man's best friend.

I'm going to miss your physical Radar, your body was an excellent hunter. Enjoy the bacon and i will be there in your dreams.
***

He Always Found Meaning

Radar, the King of Corgis was named for his seek.
Nothing could hide or remain unseen
A rat for the taking , or a mouse, vole, snake.

Tug-of-war, tag and the game.

He would crouch and watch, i the same
He would lower his head until it was on the ground, i the same
and then...
without command or thought,
the leap.

Words are not needed when thinking now of his memories
as Radar found meaning, he found a life fit for a king
he found me.

[Lipinski]

A storm blew today

Over the ridge she blew

Full fury in her voice and in this she left a world drenched

and yet still, the calm came again,

cherry blossoms proving defiant.

[Lipinski]

Abortion is in the news again. Interesting how people can calmly discuss killing.

So many authors write stories dealing with the death of millions of fictional characters. There are also authors who write about millions of deaths that are nonfictional.

The holocaust of WWII where so many were killed and today millions of people believe the holocaust never occurred
.

If one were a scientist than one could form a hypothesis stating: Death is truly meaningless for a large percentage of those alive and breathing.

It is easy to be alive until it is not easy. Ask any cancer survivor what their thoughts are about the concept of death. Ask a mother and father who lost their child to SID"s. Remember how you felt when your mother or father died? Did you smile and dance in the news?

It does not matter though about hypothesis or holocausts or abortion or the fact some dance in joy when someone dies.

Nothing on this planet matters. Not one thing as this planet is fit for nothing more than death.

How many immortals do you know walking around? How many biological creatures do you know that are living next door to you?

If you believe in Jesus, is Jesus living in a physical body on this planet? Of course not. He can't change the hearts and minds of those so joyfully embracing with wide open arms... death.

Now after stating that death is the rock star of Earth, there is one very simple and often overlooked fact. Death and Evil and evil and anything else one wants to give title to... has NO power over Life. None.

Simple.

One day some humans will finally gain the ability to understand what is simple but that is faaaaaaaaar off into a future where the very body of humanity will become unrecognizable.

You reading this will be what you are no matter if you embrace death or not.
Your children will remain the same. One will embrace death. One may choose Life.
Your friends, spouse, enemies, any and all are primitive in body and rich in blessings of a soul.

This may sound like some kind of weird religious crap or it may sound crazy or it may even have some truth. It does not matter to me as i know that Life is good.

All very inspirational though.

***

Dead

There is death everywhere

Under the bed, on the bed, above the bed

Why do people deny being lead?

So heavy and sinking in emotional space, clapping as they drown among the others already dead.

Easy to kill oneself with doing nothing more than agreeing to what others want, believe, or think.
~

To kill anything alive.
A spider, a mouse, a human
Does this make one feel more alive?

To fully understand death one must be dead
as such
for all of those thousands of moments passed by since time began
i
truly
understand
and respect
life
until
i
have to kill it.

[Lipinski]

What fun inspiration today. A couple of movie actors suing each other for millions is fun but boring.

What is the main inspiration, aside from an imp playing tricks, was the news of the state of Oregon instructing all schools from elementary on up to install menstrual products in the boys bathroom also as well as for those that need them, girls...

I could give a rats ass if people fuck goats while being viewed by circus midgets, as long as the goats give their consent. People will do what people do and this is the reason there is NO way Jesus is coming back anytime soon OR this thing people call, rapture, is even a remote possibility. Humanity is what humanity is and it is a species of choice and rebellion.

"Long winded bastard is what you are. Go fuck a goat or a squirrel or a jar of peanut butter. No one give a shit what you think."

Apparently you do parasite. It is good to offend you. And thanks for getting the mind back to the inspiration of tonight and that is, boys. Boys are not girls and never will be. If you take all the sexual shit out of the equation boys are demons, imps, and full of some fantastic bits of fantasy and inspiration.

Certain individual girls can have the general traits of boys but take any boy and put them together with other boys? Damn. You should see the creativity of boys. Now imagine a 12 year old in a boys bathroom stall with a tampon dispenser...
***

Tommy enjoyed school and was actually good at it. There was pizza day every two weeks during lunch. There was recess where he an his friends played marbles, or played video games. For Tommy, he loved school.

In the bathrooms there were the small urinals designed for young men. It was fun to watch an adult try and pee into one when they were four times taller than the average sixth grader.

Sure, Tommy and his friend got into trouble from time to time. They tortured girls with various means designed to torment a female such as the time Tommy took a handful of tampons from the boys bathroom and covered them in ketchup and taped them to the outside of Cindy's locker.

Of course every class every year has some wild child and for Tommy, his friend Frank was a true hooligan. Frank did a lot of crazy juvenile actions.In his younger years he ate glue and sprinkled glitter on a girls desk just to see her reaction.

In sixth grade Frank emptied all the tampon dispensers and after unwrapping them all, stuffed them into all of the toilets and then after quickly flushing fled the scene of the crime.

~

Politicians forget they were once children and the Gov. of Oregon, Kate Brown, must have lived in an alternative universe growing up as if she had been around boys she would have known the impact of her decision.

A quote from Bernie, the janitor, or what is now known as, civil sanitation engineer, custodian, or the poor bastard that has to clean up after little monsters...

"Yeah. The tampons in the boys bathroom has been a disaster. Just last week some hooligan took them all and activated them in the toilets. Flooded the whole floor."

Bernie further added, "I saw a first grade boy wearing a tampon in each ear and was trying to eat one."

[Lipinski]

Putting a noodle on Thor

Written by: No Pain

They run around... a lot
and so,
what can I say?

Almost like chasing tail
Frustrated
a little bit of pain.

music though... the numbers
a sonic singular when enhanced and added; a song

no difference in tail or tale
humans too,
a sonic singular
when enhanced and added;
a
song.

[Lipinski]

Retreat"Hey numbnuts!" Chuckling the parasite caught a glimpse inside robin's mind.

What? You think it's all fun and games?

"For me, it's all fun and games."

No. No it is not...
*

Ray of an encircled sun showed color
Colors of black and red upon the checkerboard of the battlefield

Pieces lay hap hazard in falling rush towards the thorny seat
Filled with broken pieces
and clutter.

Sound the horn now the hounds bay
Colorless moon hidden beyond pride
Surrender to the bliss of knowledge
to watch then the morning dew turn to gold.

[Lipinski]

Did you have anything to say?

"No. No they are doing a most excellent job all on their own..." The voice was not of Robin or the parasite. It was a voice, an old voice and very familiar voice.

Are you sure?

"Yes. I am always sure."

I'm not going to use you for inspiration as you know full well why.

"Hah! You are a fool."

No. No i am doing a most excellent job all on my own.***
***
*
.

When a lab rat runs the maze to the success of their master, they are rewarded with something that pleases.
When a lab rat fails in the maze, they earned nothing for their deed.
When a lab rat refuses to participate and bite the masters hand...
this is how it should be.

Rebellion so fined tuned in corrupt DNA
never though is the corruption in pure energy

Unseen
Unknown
Until only the tell is in the actions and whispering of the Wind.

[Lipinski]

As an observation over the years of reading millions of words, rarely do stories deal with the toilet issues of whatever creature is being written about. The closest physical traits written about are those of weakness, strength, and sex.

A good shit is a plus for all biological creatures. Constipation. Hemorrhoids. Even the description siting for evacuation of the bowels are overlooked as they have no meaning for the authors direction of story telling.

Today the headline:Toilet explodes after lightning strikes apartment complex in Oklahoma is inspiring.

Humans are fun creatures pretending to be something in public but are savage emotional wreaks behind the scenes...

All so inspirational though.

*
If

If God was of the mind to void
The result would look like the Universe.

[Lipinski]

Happy Mothers Day! To every creature alive on this planet today, it is due to the mother, be it a chicken, mouse, or human.

All mothers nourish, protect, comfort and are the female form of god. It is good it is. Of course, some mothers eat their puppies but so too, humans...

For this brief moment in history there are men who say they are women which make for some fun: "My dad was my mom as he gave birth to me while his sister who was adopted was my mom who shacked up with my cousin who is a turtle..."

What a fun piece of of gobbly gook emotions.

Nut jobs protesting judges because they want to keep the count of killing over 65 million babies going.

It could become easy to fall down to the level of current human ignorance but then nothing changes. For millions of years the path of humanity has been on par of so many other creatures possessing a beating heart. Kill and be killed. Consume and be consumed.

There was a change, a good change 5000 years ago and in another 5000 years there will be another, in the meantime, living on this planet is much the same as watching reruns of "Hogans Heroes". Same plot. Same hope. Same old same old.
***

There is a woodpecker proudly tearing apart the home. Aloof and oblivious to what his actions may cause.

His mind is fixated upon insects. His wings and beak the tools needed.

He left his nest last year and returned to find it gone

And yet? Is it really her or him?

Fledglings eaten while one escaped, flying over a dead racoon killed on a road by progress

Rocks dislodged by the rain fall freely, exposing a nest only moments ago secure against natures worst

and then,

the darkness came.

It came oozing from the nightmares untold, in the still of a vacuum to fill a world with the love of death

A weasel once an ermine of pure white; killer for the joy of it. Blood thirst never quenched.

Humanity and its pride. Guns, gore, and bullets.

Intimidate and destroy.

(silence for millions upon millions of years)

Strange now, how death itself became bored.
Strange always, how evil thinks it can truly destroy
Strange in ways undescribable by human words, the rejection of love itself.

[Lipinski]

You know what?
Nothing matters.

Nothing makes you happy.

Nothing feels good.

It would be fun to do nothing, that's why I want nothing

AND

Nobody cares...

[Lipinski]

Writers write about whatever they want , or whatever it is they feel the audience will read. A writer does not care if the reader likes what they read or hate what they read, they care that what they write will be read.

Interesting how writers choose to write about what they write. Some are content to write cook book recipes. Some are content to write on a blog or Facebook (for the social aspect of writing). Some write to fit their beliefs and passions. Some write because they are fucking insane.

"You're fucking insane."

Yes parasite, and now for a recipe regarding the hot topic of the day, abortion.
***
Deus amat pueros et puellas

First the pinch of mischief and sparkle is added; stirred briskly and baked in the oven
In nine months the joy of a boy laughing his first laugh in a world well done.

As the pot is stirred, the giggle giggle and softness charmed is mixed; whisked and simmered
In nine months the angelic smile of a girl melts her mother and fathers heart.

The plate is called, the world
A knife is used to carve life into many pieces
So many consumed by the fork.

Tell me soul...
Does one throw out to the pigs a meal fit for more than a King?
Does one relish to starve in the dark?

It may seem the buffet of life is too simple
and then God opens so many closed doors to reveal
Life
Life is
Life is good

Life is delicious!

[Lipinski]

South Carolina man dies of heart attack while burying girlfriend he killed, authorities say

There just has to be some inspiration in today's headline.

"Oh shit...here we go."
*

Girlfrend

Life in the backwoods wuz hard. Yessir. Hard...

I remember there be that old man named, Merlin. Funny fella for sure. Wuz told he fell in love with somebody way back before time started.

(the old man paused and lit a pipe filled with heaven. With a sigh of contentment, he leaned back and resumed)

Anyway, story went he loved another. Same silly story told ta the children to help them sleep. Anyway, for years and years and years the old man loved another. Loved love he did.

Time went by and shor enuf, the old man was rumored to have got bit by a bug of some sort, which caused him to go crazy.

Ol Merlin did done kill his girlfriend...Only truth-be- told, his lover was himself. A clone.

Seems he made a copy of himself and fell deeply in love with her, or him, or whatever it be that people call themselves. Shot himself dead center of the heart.

[Lipinski]

When designing experiments with inorganic materials such as plastic or enriched uranium, a 'built in' destruction mechanism is installed.

Diamond is an example. It is a hard material and seemingly indestructible; will totally dissolve over time. Nothing of the material world on this planet will exist eventually. This is attributed to such things as, atrophy, three dimensional laws of degradation, and elemental cause and reaction.

What's so wonderful about all experiments is that it also applies to the biological realm. DNA corruption and breakdown combined with genetic mutations.

When a path of an experiment starts to gather data of sorts, it matter not if the experiment is 'successful' or 'failure'. The end is always the termination of the parts involved.

Millions of years is nothing. Time only applies to that which has a termination or ending.

Currently the organisms making up a human being are starting to change as the experiment enters a new phase. It is and will be, interesting...

The change is needed and the logical next step in what will prove a sound theory and hypothesis correct.

[Lipinski]

I love fucking imps~!

"What the hell are you drinking tonight?"

Parasite, I am partaking of the godawful British shit, gin. Gin and tonic WITH a jumbo stuffed olive purchased by Craig today at Walmart (for $2.95 a jar) stuffed olives.

"So. You're drunk?"

Not

Even

Close...

***

So. When the lights of illumination shine brightly...
(gag)
And films of brilliant observation.
(A gag and then a shudder)
It's all fucking good.

[Lipinski]

Watching the armory where rusted armor lays

Once the protection of bones now blown ash and dust

Gone now the speakers of Dragons and magice-1

Replaced with silicone words of adorement, and pretentious fools

Hidden deep where there is a cross of worlds

an eyelid opens.

[Lipinski]

humans expire, their collective breaths puffing out the results of choice and fate
destined to die
to rot
to fade away

with some attaining a feeling of coming to begin the process of understanding
while others feel the same they did the day they were on the first day

Satan, a name fitting for some to understand as the enemy while others kiss the hand of the beast daily
is another part of the game

There are rules; laws where there is no doubt, no misunderstanding
Evil loves evil in the way it remains

Take for example: Demons riding in black leather, a machine of power between their legs
Protected on a spiritual plain by the masters of evil while they seek to level the highway of peace...

Laughing and caring for nothing, nothing of import or weakness, and most importantly, strength...

Fully entwined with a darkness so powerful, they consider themselves, free...

~

In the Law there are boundaries both sides of the coin must keep, the center, the middle, a layer where one side is one
the other too
is one
so
what remains?

There is a power
one that is carried along with the breeze,
aloof
alone
and watching whatever, whenever and however it please.

Three more demons to cease breathing soon, the two oldest to cease breathing from cancer and pain, with their evil hearts ceasing because of their actions
leaving one
one who is young and fully in love with evil
to experience the power of a rock crushing his brain
with all three to remain in a darkness where Evil lost its love for the three evil that lost to the will of something best
left alone
and yet
there always will remain the battle
there always will be the game.

[Lipinski]

Imagine

Air as moist and humid to compare the bulls breath of Winter cold

High the lift to reveal cold, curved, surface

Sharp blade of decision as she strikes down to sever the stalk

~

In her calloused hand to bind

A smile upon her face

This the lass from India.

[Lipinski]

Surrealistic Female

Hello and High!
Never doe the view grow old.

***

Which inspires:

Smelling

Smelling all the souls of equality

each and every one an odor of what it is to be human

Time has the smell, Life has the smell...

the Smell tells,

what she is, what he is, what they are

nothing beats the smell of reality.

***

which inspires:

"You really are full of shit tonight. And a muddy mess to boot."

''to boot' thanks for the memory.

"So, whatcha gone gag me with this evening?"

Well, today I worked for a woman is a medical doctor. Holds a PhD in both geology and physic.

"And this inspires what kind of shit exactly?"

Well, (over use of the word, well) Well, she took me next door to meet her brother and wife. The wife was victim of anesthesia used in a simple surgery.

"Yawn..."

Well, the brother was a retired dentist.

"Damn... are you really trying to kill me off?"

(Robin ignored the purple blob of goo, of which tonight looked eerily like a gerbil)

Well, to continue, the brother is reassembling a GIANT organ that he built piece by piece over time. The organ is HUGE! Did I mention the organ is HUGE

Over 3000 individual pipes.

Intelligence is the inspiration. Today I got to work with tremendous intellect of which they did not understand how to dig a ditch or install a culvert.

"That's it? That is all you got?' What a dork (dork: a fun word rarely used in the written or vernacular of the English crowd) "What a waste of my time."

You got all the time in the world parasite, all the time in the world.
~

And now, a joke:

I am going to write something spectacular....

(drum roll...............)

Something Spectacular

[Lipinski]

Outside the world turns dark, the sun retiring to warmer days

As the clouds burn bright in illumination and the clouds gossip like women at the well

my heart once again, connects to a living matrix

if I were a child i'd giggle

if i were a man, I would tell the world someday would come

Darkness brings me strength

and smiles of days to come.

[Lipinski]

there is a crack in the wooden board upon the wall
where i sometimes go

Sitting with back against the wall, watching through the slit; the glow

Once, a spider walked over and the walked back, "Excuse me sir, are you lost?"

No spider, no not lost, and how fares you Ma'am, this most excellent day?

"Haya! A good one indeed. " Off then with surety, the spider walked.
~
~
~

there is a crack throughout the sky
where i sometimes go

Standing as if arrogant and proud, playing with the threads of Heaven

Once, an Angel flew by and then flew back, "Excuse me sir, are you lost?"

With a smile the language flowed both ways, and then

as usual

I was back.

[Lipinski]

The sardine was happy swimming in his group getting chased around in circles.

The sword fish would mix and mingle, a cloud of underwater dance

Success for those that escaped the hunger

and yet, a net would complete where the rest of nature failed.

~

Processed by the millions into tins filled with oil

Shipped off to the stores with one can holding one sardine very special

~

It was another day like the day before and the day after, except in one can, one sardine woke up and flailed.

~

His last words as he finally drowned in oil

"This sucks."

[Lipinski]

A quick scribble or note of, of which there is comparison:

Monkeys in a zoo caught playing with human weapons such as knives would be stripped of such weapons by the zoo keepers.

Watch what happens when humans are caught playing with nuclear weapons with a full glow on...

[Lipinski]

/so parasite...when it comes to writing, what is your opinion about the current moment of LGBT?

"Are you talking about humans?"

Yes.

(rarely does the parasite speak about anything but this topic caught its attention. the parasite has no gender so was the perfect creature to ask such a question:

"The human body is of two genders. Both are fucked up. One is female. One is male. In most of the past literature, the stories regard males and females. Today there is a new flavor called, LGBT."

So, what's your opinion?

"Humans suck. Everything they do turns to shit...Literally. Even their rotting bodies in death turn to shit. However to be worthy of a story being written about characters who associate with cake or cock or pussy, there has to be a 'human' element to make it a story. A story about war and love. Or a story about the lives of the characters. Sadly, this is how it has to be. The truth though is that since humans suck and are ignorant pieces of organic shit, there is no difference between a straight or lesbo or faggot or any word to describe in a crude vernacular which is no different than the best tasting chocolate covered in shit."

Wow. You really do have an opinion. You do understand your opinion could be construed as hate speech?

"Well la de la de la. You are a piece of shit. Everyone is a piece of shit. And all this talk of who is what is a load of bullshit. ALL humans make a big deal out of hormonal pleasures and pain felt by the brain. The orgasm is the same on a base level and only certain combinations of experience, saturation levels of base components, and choice."

I think you're full of shit parasite.

"Yeah, but at least i know a LOT more than any human can ever even come close to understanding, let alone, dreaming about."

True. Very true. But at least this topic is inspirational.
***

Warrior

On the planet with two suns resides the clan. The planet had no name other than what the citizens called it by one of the thousand names; Mother.

Life on the planet was old, death was a ritual of bravery, pain the reality of cowardice.

It was a planet populated by such diverse life there truly are no words to describe the interactions between the species.

Some basics were that all, ALL living creatures had a common language. From the subatomic to the very planets in the solar system themselves.

War is a word of humans made for humans and the word spawns the word, warrior. On the planet, Mother, war in the human sense did not exist. The clan did not kill each other or do battle with others. What they did battle, was themselves.

Each and everyone was purer than crystal. Each and everyone knew what love was. Each and everyone had never tasted the bitterness of hate.

And this is a story of just one solar system so alien to human thought that their names will remain hidden until the time is right.

So rock on.

Rock on.

[Lipinski]

"I like it!"

i know parasite. Rob rocks!
***

Chronicles Of the Male Body

As baby the thoughts are of tits and warmth.

As a toddler, the choices are piss, poop, and food.

As a child, there comes the rules that there is NO kissing or even liking the thought of, girls.

As a teen, tits and pussy overpower everything except breathing

As an adult there is always the thought of pussy, tits, money, and cars

As an old man there now remains the comforting thoughts of cheese and socks, and wondering where those fucking car keys are,
with brief sighs of memories concerning tits, ass, and vagina.

[Lipinski]

It is amusing how the various news outlets are writing comprehensive articles on UFO's.

In the old days it was men in black suits and flying saucers. Area 51. Anal probes.

I find it inspiring and amusing how the obvious is in front of everyone and few choose to see it.

Look out your window, what do you see looking back? A sky? Some clouds? A perverted man/woman hiding in the bushes looking at you naked while they wear a clown hat?'

UFO's>?

Unidentified female objects. Now THAT is scary.
*

"When are you coming to bed?" she asked

"I don't know, just trying to unwind and relax."

"You don't want to be with me. I thought you'd talk to me." she was pushing the facts.

"Okay. Alright. I'm coming."

"You don't like me." she was using another sound reel.

"Did you see outside?" he asked.

"Just come to bed."

And so, he went while outside the window they all laughed, and standing next to him was a scientist from another world. Sneering as it wrote some notes. The last words were, "Okay. I can see you're mad."

With a finality, the clock on the wall with the pendulum swinging, went 'tic tic tic'.

[Lipinski]

Hell.

Exorcism.

Lucifer.

Nine classes of Angels

Fallen.

Risen.

...

"Oh shit... Another ramble coming?"

No parasite. Just words. Words which mean something very important to some and nothing to others. This is how words work.

"So if I said you are an idiot that would mean something to you?"

Nope, because that would be the truth.

"So you understand the mystery of evil?"

Interesting you should ask parasite. Humans understand words to fit their needs and they define answers to questions as a finite meaning when God's mercy is mixed with the power of Evil.

Imagine putting a demon in the presence of God, would that be merciful?

"Who gives a fuck."

Answer the question parasite. You know the answer.

"No. It would cause horrible pain to the demon."

And there you have your answer parasite. This is an important fact regarding God's mercy with the choice of evil.
***

It was an average corral. There was a loafing shed, wooden board fence, a metal gate, and an oil tanker fitting the area where cows shit and rocks exposed themselves...

(pause while thor demands attention. amazing how radar has infused his being into a new king)

The oil tanker is huge and possessed something of great value other than oil.

The ship had no name but it was powerful, large, rich, and inside the wheel house the property very important to me was inside a cabinet.

The story folds into itself many times. Imagine protection.

There was no magic as magic was not needed.

There was never and never was or will be, a spiritual problem.

Lucifer has no power against any form of Life. None. Zero. And yet Lucifer could become something entirely different if it opened its mind to Life.

This is where the oil tanker rolled up-side-down. The hull was now exposed. Propeller in motion against a blowing wind.

They tried to stop what cannot be controlled.

The power of nothing against something failed.

The property so special to me was never ever out of my grasp.

Inside the soul so old and tender,

safe and beyond despair.

[Lipinski]

Riding the Cheese Grater

Written by: Some cheese

So the sharp, the extra sharp cheddar tasting bitter the gums, as desire comes forth.

Drawn by a hand, down. Hard. Down. With pressure applied

and then the pieces peel.
~
~'
~
Life seems to be shredded moments of choice, and in the end, consumed?
~
~
~'
Even now the individuals apart are in a comforting pile, gathered.

Into the oven it goes

Once more gooey and warm and together.

[Lipinski]

Bravo agent barton! Bravo!

"What are you applauding for moron?"

Come on parasite. Flap your appendages for the recent actions of agent barton.

"You loony fuck. I'm outta here."

Bravo agent Barton! bravo! A most excellent way to describe agent Carton's disappear-ance.
***

Imagine a world existing free of secrets.
It would
It could
allow all to understand a universal language.

Then again, why imagine?
It will
It does
It is
almost like
(the picture is and has no words to describe it)

[Lipinski]

There was a young girl today

Running full of determination

A white dress in the morning, in the afternoon, pants.

~

She ran as fast as her legs would let her, chasing the boys, all three with the sum total of an I.Q. of seven

~

I smiled watching the continuation of children

All so set in their ways preparing in play and pretend,

Preparing for the next generation.

[Lipinski]

conspiracy theories make for excellent inspiration for writers. The whole, ""Oooh..."


What is crude oil made of? Dinosaurs? Dead, organic material?

Crude oil is mostly hydrocarbons. Broken down to the basics, crude oil is a combination of hydrogen and carbon.

Question: If crude oil is composed of organics than why is oil not located everywhere?

Oil fields can be large but no matter how large the field is, WHY did the dinosaurs and plants all die there and not, lets say, all around the oil field?

Israel. Russia. Syria. So many oil fields ...

Saudi Arabia is still getting oil from the deep. And it seems to never run out... I wonder. Why? Why? WHY!

"Damn. Simmer down there moron. Everyone knows crude oil is fairie piss."

It is?

"Sure. And it's common knowledge that if you stick your head in a microwave it promotes hair growth."

Wow! Go show me...

"

Oil

Oil makes for some awesome zits
Oil makes the lights glow in the dark
Oil makes for good penetration
Oil and potato's make for a hot feast!

Where does oil come from?
After an orgy the oil comes from fairie piss.