Courting Deep Blue

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Lester Curtis
Long Fiction Editor
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Joined: January 11, 2010, 12:03:56 AM
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Re: Courting Deep Blue

Post by Lester Curtis »

Nice job overall, Eddie. You hung a great big "Why?" in the middle of everything and wrote the details around it. The analytic side of me says, "That's not how stories are supposed to ...", but you made it work anyway. Now my analytic is speechless and slightly embarrassed, while the rest of me is murmuring, "Waugh ... where'd that *come* from--?"

Really, my imagination doesn't go to places like that. I'm good for endless pedestrian details and everyday character emotions and reactions, but, "What's the story about?" "Guy falls in love with a shark and somehow knows it loves him back, and he wants it to eat him."

WHAT

THE ...

I had a little trouble sorting out the characters, especially in the second paragraph, but that wasn't enough to ruin it for me, because you made the character motivation matter without explaining it.

Thanks for the ride.
I was raised by humans. What's your excuse?
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