Posted: March 01, 2009, 11:51:29 PM
Good intro. At least the intro worked, but after the opening first couple of paragraphs, the story took on a weird tone, and the story became increasingly hard to understand.
I don’t really know what the story was about! Was it a stream-of -conscience type thing? Bits and pieces molded together from fragments of stories that flash in our dreams? I don’t know, but I assume that the author tired to experiment with our sub-conscious minds----- and really confused mine!
The author seems to have a decent command of the language, and that makes me think he is attempting a deep and very uncanny physiological story.
Some of the science was too much and not needed. I do like his use of metaphors . However, naming a planet ‘34354.2.12.20993.8539’ is too long and not easy to remember. A story should be entertaining and easy to follow.
An antipodean planet? I don’t know what that is. Only two sides of the planet support life? You if stretch the meaning of antipodean that might be the answer, but I doubt it.
Many word choices were not correct, or else I just didn’t understand the sentence and how they were used.
A weird tale with reference to many events taking place on Earth near the end, but I don’t know how that added in, or to what purpose they represented.
I didn’t understand much about this story.
A Weird One!
I don’t really know what the story was about! Was it a stream-of -conscience type thing? Bits and pieces molded together from fragments of stories that flash in our dreams? I don’t know, but I assume that the author tired to experiment with our sub-conscious minds----- and really confused mine!
The author seems to have a decent command of the language, and that makes me think he is attempting a deep and very uncanny physiological story.
Some of the science was too much and not needed. I do like his use of metaphors . However, naming a planet ‘34354.2.12.20993.8539’ is too long and not easy to remember. A story should be entertaining and easy to follow.
An antipodean planet? I don’t know what that is. Only two sides of the planet support life? You if stretch the meaning of antipodean that might be the answer, but I doubt it.
Many word choices were not correct, or else I just didn’t understand the sentence and how they were used.
A weird tale with reference to many events taking place on Earth near the end, but I don’t know how that added in, or to what purpose they represented.
I didn’t understand much about this story.
A Weird One!