Aphelion

As story about Iraq? Yes, I believe Joseph Vadalma has composed a very good tale aimed at the stupidity of American policies in the Middle East! Good job, and one that should hit home.

The aliens---the Spakerusms----sound like President Bush after liberating Iraq. And the big mistake made in Iraq is simple: The Iraqis are not American! No! They are not, and our idea of government is as strange to them as theirs is to us. How can democracy wash over people who have been reared in fascism and accept it, unquestionably?

Now to get away from the political side.

The intro worked, and the more I read, the more I became interested in the story. And the build up of the Spakerusms very fitting for a race that has decided to intervene in the affairs of another civilized planet. They watched, learned our languages and cultures, then waited until Earth was advanced enough in global communication and informational technology in order to used our native technology for their purposes.  

Nice word choices and good sentence balances with just the correct amount of description mixed with telling, and the other input, sensory, was integrated into the story as it unfolded. Good.

For me, the science was off. Aliens as advanced as the Spaerusms would have protective clothing that would stop bullets! I’m sure about that one, and their electronics? Centuries beyond ours? They could detect anybody anywhere unless counter measures were used, and the story doesn’t suggest the use of counter measures against the Spaterusms’ advanced technology!

It’s Okay to capture an alien that is centuries ahead of us in technology, but the way the alien is capture by getting around his advanced tech, must be incorporated in the story!

To me, the ending was very fitting if you look at this story from a political viewpoint, and I think that that is the only way to thoroughly understand what this story is aimed at!!

Good Job!!!

 

The problem with reducing the scope of the story would be that I think Joe was really aiming at examining the moral dilemma faced by Majoraski near the end of the tale in its current form.  The Spakerusms impose draconian rule over the Earth after an arbitrary deadline passes (hmm ... that DOES sound familiar), so Majoraski's decision to join the Resistance seems justified. But before long, Majoraski begins to see that the tactics employed to fight the Spakerusm occupation may be no better in the moral / ethical sense than those used by the Spakerusm.

Thus, the story can be seen as castigating both the invaders and the Resistance. Both sides proceed from the assumption that they are acting for the good of the people of Earth; both sides commit terrible crimes in the process. (If the story is a depiction of the Iraq situation, Joe's position would appear to be that the invasion and occupation were a bad idea, badly executed, but the tactics of the insurgents are as bad or worse.)

Joe, am I right about your intent?

Robert M.

I dunno if people were fighting the Spakerusm's imposition of world peace (although there are plenty of McVeighs and Kozcynski(sp) types who don't even like their OWN governments telling them what to do) so much as the summary executions of people who broke Spakerusm laws ...

Dubya would say that the Spakerusms took over because 'they hate our freedom'. (Of course, Dubya meant 'freedom to invade any country we don't like', 'freedom to tear up treaties', 'freedom to violate international law, but expect others to follow U.S. law', and some people DO kinda resent that sort of thing.)

Robert "had to drag Bush into this somehow" M.