Aphelion

The price for ultimate mastery of the arts of assassination may be high...

The author of this piece is sorely disappointed by the lack of response. If you have read the story, please say so, lest she think that Nobody Is Listening. If you haven't read it, do -- it has some interesting points to make about the dangers of specialization.

Ms. Gillette,

First of all, welcome to Aphelion! I'm sure you'll find plenty here to like, and we're always glad to hear new voices.

I read the story, and just couldn't think of anything to say about it one way or another. So, that's the good news and the bad news.

I do recall being a bit confused early on, as at one point Glori's sword seemed to turn into a knife, until I realized she carried both. And one thing that got my attention was when she chopped down a bunch of foliage to do that hidden-knife diversion -- I'm sure the noise of that activity would have given away her position. The rest of her tactics seemed pretty clever, but I'm not a trained fighter, so I really can't be certain.

I do like the plot: bad boss romantically manipulating his employees, with subsequent revenge.

That second voice in her head, though -- right up until the end, I thought she was getting that from somewhere outside of herself (implanted radio, psychic link, or some such), so that went a little sideways for me.

As to the rest, I agree with your own critique concerning technical errors:

I read through the story a hundred times. Even a few other sets of eyes missed them.

That happens to me, too.

Hope this helps.