Don't miss a single hillarious issue of Bruno the Bandit,
Freefall or The Melonpool Chronicles! Check back every day for laughs
from Aphelion's featured cartoonists!
Editorial
The Senior Editor's usual drivel about whatever...
Hello and welcome!
This month's thrilling installment is loosely based on the concept of futility. As in; don't bother to plan a vacation and expect the weather to co-operate, don't wash your car unless you want it to rain, don't spend your last cash on seed to plant unless you want a drought, and don't buy a machine and expect it to remain in good repair.
The invading aliens always say "resistance is futile..." Why is that? Our species has proved time and time again that resistance wins, but it takes time. We don't know how to give up. How can we lose?
I was presented with a couple of seemingly unsolvable mechanical problems last week, and the concept of futility was brought to the forefront of my mind as I struggled to decypher what was then a perplexing set of problems. I had the right parts, I knew that beyond the shadow of a doubt-- I just couldn't get them to fit. I pushed and tugged, pounded and twisted, hammered and tapped... To no avail. Until-- I looked again and saw that I had two of the pieces backwards. Within minutes, the futility was gone... Everything fit.
That's the way it always goes. First there is a problem, then there is no problem, then there is... Um, sorry. I was channeling Donovan there for a minute. Where was I? Oh yes, the frustration factor of things that seem futile. Don't let it get to you. Plain bull-headedness has solved more problems than any other human effort. The human ability to never give up, never accept defeat, to die if necessary, but to win-- above all, to win!
"Resistance is futile!" Oh yeah? Come here Bub, I wanna show you something...
Thanks for your time.
Dan
Aphelion's "Return of the King" Writing Contest!
Hear ye! Hear ye! Aphelion is sponsoring another short story contest. This
one's theme: the Return of the King. Not Tolkien's king. I speak of
the once and future king, King Arthur of Britain. When Mallory closed
his famous epic, he left the door open for a sequel with these lines:
"Yet som men say in many partys of Inglonde that kynge Arthure ys not
ded, but had by the wyll of oure Lorde Jesu into another place, and
men say he shall com agayne."
Mallory is not likely to come again, so it is up to us. The contest
rules are simple. Write a story of no more than 5000 words about King
Arthur's return. You pick the time, place and manner of his return.
The story can be science fiction, high fantasy or anything in
between. One entry per person. Submissions must be received by May
15, 2001 and should include the words "Return of the king contest
submission" in the header. Winners will be printed in the July issue
of Aphelion.
I'd like to thank those of you who have sent e-mails or signed into the
Lettercol for your feedback. Keep those messages coming, folks!
Without those messages we will never know what we need to improve
upon. Hope you like the improvements so far!
Aphelion Staff:
Dan Hollifield
Senior Editor, Publisher
Kim Holec
Poetry/Filk Editor
Robert Wynne
WebMaven
Cary Semar
Short Story Editor
McCamy Taylor
Asssistant Short Story Editor
Jeffrey Williams
Production Editor/Serials Editor
Ralph Benedetto, Jr.
Asssistant Serials Editor
Roger Bennett
Editor Emeritus
Serialized Stories & Novellettes
Aphelion Special Presentation
Illegal
Aliens SAMPLE CHAPTER -- ELEVEN
By Nick Pollotta and Phil Foglio When a spaceship lands in Central Park, its a shame that the first humans to gain entry happened to be a street gang... A sample chapter of the soon to be re-issued Sci-fi/Humor novel.
Six-Hundred Moons
By McCamy Taylor Adolescence is never easy, it is even worse if you are a mermaid in captivity.
The Pawnbroaker
By Tony Cavello People sometimes focus on certain things to the point of obsession, only to realize
too late that they were not important.
No Chance
By Guy Hasson Physics says that if parallel universes exist, then in half the universes
the sun turns itself off at noon, eyeglasses don't work on national
holidays, and mirrors reflect only left hands.
The New Moon
By Aeryn Sykes Ian drove a hard bargain, but one day, he got a lot more than he bargained for.
The Original Jamie Ray
By Robert Thurston You will not believe how many Jamie Ray's there are out there, until you get on the
Internet.
The White Pawn's Gambit
By Duncan Stuart Behind every board lies a battlefield, and on it, the hearts of
wooden warriors beat. It's more than just a game. It's life and death.
Surgard's Court Case
By Robert Collins Having vanquished a few monsters, Surgard had come to the conclusion that monsters
weren't quite so fearsome as were clever human beings. Surgard found no better example
of that than in the complicated land of Remulus.
Washi In The Underworld
By Scott Reeves If you would make a bargain with the Lord of Death, you must go into his private places.
Links Updated -- 9-10-00 --
Each of the three links below have changed. Please take note and adjust your Bookmarks if necessary. The first link below gives you the introduction to the Mare Inebrium, the banner link now gives you access to all of the Mare stories, and the third link now gives you acess to the Mare Inebrium Online Starter kit. The online Starter Kit will be updated as often as Mare writers make necessary.
The banner above links to
all the Mare Inebrium Stories on one page!
The
Mare Inebrium Starter Kit.
--Updated 12/10/2000-- This is a link to all the background information for the Mare Inebrium stories so far.
This is a must read for all Mare Inebrium writers and fans!
Features
Aphelion's Daily Comics
By Mark Stanley, and Steve Troop Did he say daily? Yep, Aphelion is proud to feature two of the funniest comic strips on the Internet, Mark Stanley's "Freefall" and Steve Troop's "The Melonpool Chronicles". Bookmark this page, you don't want to miss a single installment!
Double Wide
by Jim Parnell "Interview with the Jasper"
WARNING: Contains Language.
Dan Hollifield reviews: "Wizard Sword"-- The new novel by William Hill A classic fantasy with a unique take on some of the familiar elements of the genre.
The Listening Room
by Rob Wynne Rob Wynne bangs his head against Phoenix's "Into the Fire"
A Challenge to Writers... --8\8\2000-- Not a contest, but a series of ideas to spark off a story. Challenge 1 is the paintings of Daniel Hannaquand, Challenge 2 is a collection of narrative hooks composed by Dan Hollifield.
Aphelion Links Page --1\22\2001--
Click here to see the Links Page. Our fellow E-zines, Astronomy, research material, entertainment, and much, much more!
Aphelion IRC Chat --2\16\2001-- Information about a new feature for Aphelion. IRC Chat is a fun way to talk to our readers, writers, staff members, and other netizens. This link takes you to a basic intro and provides further links to the IRC software that you can download for free. Look for new updates as we refine this feature.
Aphelion JAVA Chat --2\12\2001-- For a quick look at the JAVA chat client, this link launches a new browser window that takes you to a Log-in form for a JAVA-based chat in your browser window. No specian programs are needed. This will be a very simple, but passable IRC client, very no-frills. This will also tell you if there's anyone else in the chatroom, by the way.
Aphelion Banners
And banner artwork for links. If you want to link to Aphelion and want more than a text link, then this page is for you. Some of these banners are finished, but most of them lack only my adding text to make them complete. Unfinished banners can be completed and e-mailed to you within 8 days. The banner HTML code-- and image --can be e-mailed on request, or can be more simply copied from the "View / Page Source" option in your web browser. Finished images can be copied from the banner artwork page itself. An exchange of links or banner links is always welcome. Link Swap E-mail should be sent to: Dan Hollifield
If you would like to receive notices from Aphelion when this page is
updated, please join our new, revised, automatic mailing list. To
subscribe:
Send a message to
majordomo@america.net with the following in the body of the
message:
subscribe aphelion <email address>
As always, this mailing list will only be used to notify you of new
issues and will never be given out to anyone else... 'cause I hate
spam as much as you do!
Instead of the back issues the banner below now takes you to the Archives-where all our past stories are available for you to read.
I've decided to ditch the back issues in favor of the Archives. The Archives are easier to use and can be indexed by author or story title. Hopefully this will ease the task of finding a favorite story. We may start a page of our past cover art, if
there is a call for it. Thanks for your
readership for without you, nothing we do has any meaning.